I traded a corner condo unit on the top floor in Manila for a house and lot near the beach in a Province where I have no relatives and barely know anyone. It’s been one of if not the most daunting decision I have made so far and by all accounts, seem to be one of the best.
There ia no simple explanation to why I made the decision but simply put; it’s short term pain for long term gain. I use to pride myself for not being apart of the rat race until I found myself myred in it. Since I was able to identify the problem, I immediately proceeded to persue a solution which ultimately brought me to this juncture.
I am still ways away, albeit enroute to where I want to be. My only gripe is that I wasn’t able to reach this far earlier in life to share my triumphs with family and friends who have passed way too soon.
New ventures are akin to lifting heavy shit off the floor for me. It’s those first few centemeters that are the most challenging… Or I would like to think so. But it gets progressively hardet when as you progress.
One of the lessons sports (distance running & powerlifting) and my career has taught me is that getting atop the mountain is only half the battle, you still need to climb back down… Then repeat the process on more challenging peaks. It does get familiar with experience but harder with age as your physicality degrades over time. Then it becomes an existentiale question of how many figurative peaka you can summit in your lifetime before time catches you.
I, myaelf still have a few I’d like yo reach before I call it quits. But Iust admit these past several months feel significantly heavier than they ought to and it is taking its toll.
I started coding back in 1999, when writing your media player in mIRC because my Pentium II can’t run winAMP and mIRC at the seme time was fun. Back then I didn’t see it as a career, I knew I wanted to be involved with it but didn’t really see it as a source of income.
Fast forward 2 decades and I am still doing it …as a source of income more than anything else. Though my work has come and gone, swallowed up by ever expanding companiea. While technology has become more accessible to most people that my skills are almost obsolete. It begs the question: is it time to.move on?
Ideally i would want to have several jobs. One that pays the bills and another that givea me fullfilment. Being a web developer now isn’t providing the latter. Now I ask myself whether to proceed with it as a job or a hobby.
What is the future of work? What industry would I thrive in? More over, what industries will my daughter be able to get into when she enters the workforce?
For the past 7 months, most of my time has been spent in this 5×5 meter space. I work, workout, eat, sleep repeat.
The Pandemic changed views on a lot of things, especially housing. I used to think owning properties is much better than renting; Now not so much. I find myaelf liking the idea of trading the stability/autonomy of owning your home vs the mobility/freedom of renting.
I want to avoid places governed by myopic leaders and less than desirable communities. Paying a iittle extra in rent vs the upkeep of a home doesn’t seem that big of a price to pay for the freedom from being tethered to a physical location.
I’ve experienced renting, and owning properties. Both have their merits, but the pandemic highlighted several things I overlooked before when considering where my family and I live… The community and governance. Which is why I am leaning more towards renting as oppose to owning properties in the future.
I make it a point to have voluntary debates with my inner coward atleast 3 times a week. My inner coward is that voice of reason that advicea you againsy doing dumb shit and pointing you to tge path of least resistance. It the former arguement in the flight or fight response.
It’s one of the primary drivers why I took up distance running in my early 20’s and powerlifting/weight lifting in my early 30’s. It allows me to challenge my limits in a relatively controlled environment which prevent me from being stagnant. My inner coward want to be comfortable and aafse at all times and will always point me towards the path of least resistance. Which is prudent in most cases but i have to keep myself cognisanct of the fact that there are instances where there is no way forward but through thick walls which we have to break through in order to get to the other aide. And that is the constant point of contention: on choosing your battles to win the war that is life.
I would call it more of a knee-jerk reaction more than a response to be honest. I’ve reached the point wherein I am more afraid of the government especially law enforcement rather than Covid-19; Atleast with the virus, you know what to expect and can prepare accordingly. I do appreciate their efforts and I am thankful for what little stability we currently enjoy. But the reaction of both the government and some people made me question: is the grass really greener where you water it? Or is the soil not suited for planting and it’s time to seek greener pastures?
We’re in the tail-end of week 6 of the Enhanced Community Quarantine implemented by the national government last March 15, 2020. Apart from the increased difficulty getting food and other “necessities“, not much has changed from our way of life. In actuality, it improved our quality of life; Air quality is better, noise pollution has gone down and our monthly expenditure has gone done. But I feel this is just the calm before the storm which majority of people don’t seem to notice. Regardless, the best course of action is to take the life lessons / reminders this experience has enlightened me with:
Privacy is freedom: The less people and the internet knows about you, the less people you’ll have trying to stick you with their unsolicited opinions up your ass because they have too much up theirs. It also pays to have less competition in this rat race we’re currently in.
It’s always your fault: Regardless of what policies governments and institutions institute, or decisions other people make for you, it’s you who’ll have to live with the consequences not them.
Murphy’s Law: “If something can go wrong, it will.” I’m already asking myself how I can better prepare for the next pandemic, let’s face it, we know it’s gonna happen again.
Stay away from social media: “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience” — Mark Twain
Granny still knows best: Rule #1: The Boss is always right. Rule #2: if the Boss is wrong, read Rule #1.
It’s been years since I last played with my desktop. Since PC hardware has grown by leaps and bounds since I last tried, I figured to give it a shot. Inspired by the Google Pixel live wallpaper I use this Ocean weather theme for Rain Wallpaper, an app you can find on Steam. Another theme on my rotation is this Elegant weather theme I found on DeviantArt.
I finally got a Subaru WRX, an aspiration of mine since cr I was in grade school watching WRC on AXN. I opted to get a used low mileage (29,000km), slightly modified one for half the cost of a brand new current year model. There ia significant riak in getting uaed cars but with a little luck and a lot of research, there are pretty big savings to be had. Thankfully my prudence paid off and I got a good one for a reasonable price. The car already had most if not all the modifications i wanted:
Invidia Q300 full exhaust
STI brembo brakes
STI 18″ wheels
Mishimoto Cold Air intake
Tuned to a modest 300 hrsprs
All i needed to do was some basic maintenance stuff to the cat:
Change all fluids, oil, coolant etc
Replaced all brake pads
Replaced all filters
Check tires and alignment
Changed ownership and renewed registration for the year
All in all, it costed me half of what a new WRX goes for in today’s market, which is a good deal in my book especially if you count the cost of the modifications done already.
I should be feeling elated that I got the car I wanted for so long at a good price yet I can’t help but feel this empty disappointed feeling. I am happy I achieved the goal I set out to get, I just had this expectation that it would bring greater satisfaction. I should’ve paid more attention to the journey and not the destination now that I can reflect on it. It is a sexy car and I am glad I got it. The greater takeaway for me in this experience is that I shouldn’t hinge my happiness or expectation of happiness based on material things. It’s so cliche but so true at the same time… experience is still the best teacher.